I want to take a moment to reflect on how i have changed in the past few years.
Past me :
Past me was quite shy. She had no idea about how to communicate her boundaries. she used avoidance as a coping mechanism instead of clear communication. she just stayed quiet ,hoping that her emotions would just go away by themselves. She ran away from the situations that caused her anxiety.
when she least expected it life threw an unexpected challenge at her,it forced her face to face with the fact that she had no idea how boundaries even work. because of this she began working with a youth worker,they started an open communication about emotions. This began the process of figuring out her boundaries.
Me today :
She has made a decision to go outside of her comfort zone and time and time again face the situations that make her feel anxious. a decision to speak up even when the topic in hand is difficult. She has learned that emotions wont go away by avoidance. The energy of an emotion will stay until we speak up. Small things will become a huge “monsters” when we avoid them.
This work has been done in many different places and relationships. Time and time again she finds the courage to speak up. Time and time again it gets easier and she notices that nothing bad happens.
nowadays she knows where her boundaries lie and how to communicate about them. She no longer uses avoidance as a way to cope and instead faces the difficult situations head on. Somedays she might need some extra courage and patience from others. Sometimes the anxiety still takes the lead But with the right people growth is possible.
The biggest thing during her journey has been realizing that avoidance just simply does not work. no one is a mind reader so the only way forward is via open and honest communication. ❤