Why asexual men are lacking representation?

Little wheat's writings
2 min readJan 28, 2023

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Photo by Ryoji Iwata on Unsplash

when a comment from stranger made me reflect.

I had an eye opening moment after reading someones story here on medium. A person in the comments pointed out how difficult it is for Men on the asexual spectrum to get any representation.

Our society sees men as these hyper sexual beings who cant control themselves around women. This is not the whole truth, but its also where my fears are rooted in. The society's False stereotypes of how all men are. Women get the seeds of fear planted into them from a very young age, so It is not that surprising that unknown men make me feel uneasy. I am on a journey of unlearning these false narratives and processing my fears so i can feel safe and comfortable around men.

The news we see everyday are pushing this false narrative even more. This is ruining everyone's reputation for no reason. now men have a lot of work to do in order to prove to women that they are safe to be around. The fast majority of guys are just normal people like everyone else who can control their urges or might not even experience any at all and are silently struggling with the lack of representation.

Trigger warning : a brief mention of sexual violence.

This exact same problem is present when we discuss peoples experiences with sexual harassment/violence. I think the current statistics are somewhere among the lines of 1 in 3 women and 1 in 6 men have had these experiences in their lifetime, and this is only the cases that are reported.

How much of this is happening in silence? no one knows. It is so much more difficult for men to be believed because of this false narrative of every guy constantly wanting sex. yes, it is difficult for women too but i can`t talk from all perspectives at the same time.

The vast majority of the cases shown in the news are the one`s where a woman is the victim and a man is the perpetrator, where is the other perspective! I am not saying that women`s experiences are not valid but it is important to turn the perspective upside down because we already get so many stories told from the women's side of things.

We have a lot of work to do when it comes to debunking gender stereotypes but we are heading in the right direction. Thank you stranger in the comments for making me reflect. ❤

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